Happy 60th Birthday, Daddy! (March 30)

Happy 60th birthday, Dad! I wonder what you would have thought about turning 60. I can imagine that it would not have bothered you at all. You never were bothered by age, or getting older.
Charlie and I had a little birthday "celebration" for you today. We went to the cemetery with your favorite treat--Reese's Peanut Butter Cups. We sang "Happy Birthday" to you, and then we each ate one and left one for you. Charlie insisted that I unwrap it because the animal that you "would send to eat it would probably not know how to get the wrapper off." He thought that you would have a deer eat the candy. In fact, that night a fawn showed up on our front porch, and he told me that you sent it to say thank you to us for the treat. I think that he was probably right. It is rare that we see a fawn without her family, and that night we did. Ryan sang to you later that night. I wish you could have been there in person to hear both of them. They would love you so much, and I know how much you would love them. Not a day goes by that I do not think about what a huge loss it is for all of us.
I remember when I gave you this poem. It reminded me of you so much that I wrote it down and put it in a card for you. You kept it in your wallet, and I remember going through your wallet after you died and there it was. I think it says so much about the person you were, and the person you wanted me (and everyone else who knew you) to be. You made us all so much better for having known you.

When I die, give what is left of me to children.
If you need to cry, cry for your brothers walking beside you,
Put your arms around anyone, and give them what you need to give me
I want to leave you with something, something better than words or sounds.
Look for me in the people you have known and loved
And if you cannot live without me, let me live on in your eyes, your mind, and your acts of kindness.
You can love me most by letting hands touch hands, and letting go of children that need to be set free.
Love does not die. People do
So when all that is left of me is love, Give me away...

Happy birthday to the most wonderful, nicest person I have ever know. I love you, Daddy!

Four AMAZING Years!

Happy 4th Birthday, to my sweet, sweet boy! How can it be that you are already four? The time has flown by so quickly, and all of it has been so much fun. I think back on the night you were born and that excitement that filled the room. Our hearts were bursting with love. We also felt pain like we had never felt when they told us that you stopped breathing twice, and they would be putting you in the NICU. I am so thankful that nothing was wrong--and really, you probably just forgot to breath a few times.

You make our world a better place. Wherever we go, people smile when they see you. You are a beautiful little boy, but you also have this infectious smile and laugh. People are drawn to you. You make people happy!

This has been a great past year. You started a new school, and you are doing so well. It amazes me all of the things you know and have learned. You are very smart! Sometimes I forget that you are only four because you have this crazy logic, and you will argue a point with me. It is wonderful and frustrating all at the same time. You say some of the most hilarious things to us.

Fridays are still my favorite day because I get to spend it with you. We always have fun, and you are always so thankful for everything we do--even if it is going to buy groceries. You remind me a lot of your Grandpa Charlie because you make everything you do a fun adventure. Last week was the start of ski school at Deer Valley, and I cannot believe how well you are doing. I am sure it helped that Daddy has taken you up to Alta several times already this year. And who says there is no snow?

You and Ryan have become such great little buddies. I know he can make you mad when he destroys whatever you might be working on or playing with, but you handle it pretty well (most of the time). I love how when you talk to him, you always refer to him as "sweet, sweet baby boy!" He looks up to you and always wants to do whatever you are doing. You are a very good big brother. And we always tell you to be nice to him because one day he may be bigger than you :)

Your other love is the Utah Jazz. Your eyes light up when you watch them play, and you always wear your Hayward jersey and shorts for each game that we watch from home. I always say that you are their biggest little fan. I cannot imagine that other three year olds know the players or got upset when they heard that Ronnie Price was traded to the Suns. You said, "Mama, can we just fly to Phoenix to watch him play?" Pretty funny!

Thank you, thank you, thank you for making each day a great day! Thank you for being wonderful you! I hope you always know how much we love you--too, too much! Here's to another fabulous year!

Love,

Mommy

Bye-bye baby mullet...

...Hello Big Boy Haircut! On December 10, 2011, Ryan got his first haircut. Scott and Shane came over so that Shane could cut Ryan's hair for the first time. I trust only the best with my boys first do :)

What a traumatic situation it was! Ryan screamed and cried. I had to hold him tight to make sure he did not move too much, but Shane was calm and worked his magic. I am still amazed at the quality of the cut, especially since he used electric trimmers. He was worried he would cut Ryan with the scissors because Ryan was moving so much.

Needless to say, he did a great job, and Ryan looks adorable! Now people will stop referring to him as "such a beautiful little girl!"

Sweet baby boy, you are so handsome!

To our Good Girl...

Dear Sweet Bridger,

What a sad day it was for all of us on Saturday to have to let you go. You are already greatly missed around the house. You were such a good girl. I know we told you (and Dakota) that all of the time because now Ryan refers to all dogs as “good girl.” I am not even sure that he knows what the word “dog” means.

Thank you for bringing so much joy to our lives, especially your daddy’s life for the past 13 years. You truly were man’s best friend. I remember the first time I watched you and Aspen at my house. Dakota, of course, hated both of you and growled every time either of you would come within 10 feet of her. You destroyed a plant I had as well as two pictures frames, but I let it go because I loved Peter, and he loved you two.

You have been a constant companion on runs, hikes, etc., and you were always so excited to do it. It was so hard to see you deteriorating over the past couple of months because you could not do the things you loved most, and that broke our hearts. I went on a run yesterday and thought of you. I could just imagine that you are out there somewhere running around and chasing birds.

We were laughing the other night when we were talking about the day you and Dakota (who did grow to love you and become your best buddy) chased a squirrel down in the backyard and tore it to shreds. No, that is not funny—the poor squirrel—but the fact that it looked like a massive blood bath, especially on Dakota’s face, was what was amusing. That squirrel definitely put up a fight.

You were the best guard dog. Everyone was afraid of that bark. Little did most know that you were the sweetest, most gentle dog. Never once did we worry about the boys being around you. Thank you for letting Charlie ride you like a horse, pull your tail and ears, and poke you in the eyes. You took it all in stride, and he loved you so much. In fact, losing you has been tough on Charlie. I have not witnessed true emotion like that out of a three-year-old. Somehow, he just gets it.

And then there is your daddy, Peter, who loved you like you were his first child. He was so good to you and you to him. I told him that when I die, I want to come back as a dog with an owner like him. True, unconditional love. When the boys were born, you did not become a dog to him like some people said you would, you were still his baby girl.

Well, Good Girl, it is time for you to run wild with your momma, Aspen. Thank you for everything you gave us. We will miss you greatly and love you so much. We were so lucky to have you in our lives.

My three favorite dudes...

There are those times in life when I just think to myself how lucky I am. I have an amazing husband who makes me smile and laugh, and who I truly just enjoy being with—he is my best friend and the love of my life. I also have two beautiful boys who make my heart grow more and more every time I see their sweet faces. Sometimes life is moving so fast that I forget to think about all of the wonderful things and people in my life. I am truly blessed. Thank you Sweets, Charlie and Ry Ry for making my life so incredibly wonderful. I love you all too, too much!!!

Grins, giggles and lots of teeth

What a rough month and a half we have had with you, Little Man! It all started back in August with you throwing up, which was quickly followed by a bout of the runs that lasted for days and days and weeks and weeks. Your poor little body lost two pounds in one week! That is a lot of weight when you only weight 20 lbs.

Over the past month you have been poked and prodded and put under anesthesia, and you have been such a trooper--you have constantly kept a smile on your sweet little face. It seems we could all learn something from your demeanor during this time.

Needless to say, here we are with not many answers. The good news is that your liver function is normal, you were negative for Cystic Fibrosis, and your blood work looks pretty good. Now we are awaiting results from a biopsy that was taken during an endoscopy last week. And let's just say you were AWESOME for that! You went 22 hours without food and were still in a good mood. Mama would have been cranky and crying after that long.

This Thursday you will be 15 months. You have a zillion teeth (as seen in the photo), you have fabulous (long) hair, and this infectious smile. Many times you are mistaken for a girl. People stop me quite often to comment on your beautiful big eyes. They are quite fantastic!

You do not say too much (I think Charlie does all of the talking for you), but you love to laugh. You can kick and throw a ball like no other 15 month old, and you are fast on your feet. You and Charlie are interacting more and more, and I love it. You love going in his room in the morning to wake him up before school. Your favorite game with him is hide and seek--he hides and you look for him. When you do find him, you squeal with delight and run the other way, and he chases you.

I am sorry that you have had to have all of these tests. Dr. Book and Dr. Baar just want to make sure it is nothing too serious. We are very lucky to have two incredible doctors looking after your well being. Plus, you have many angels above watching out for you as well. How lucky we are!

Alright, Little Man, I love you too, too much. I wish you health and happiness and good test results.

Love,

Mama

Charlie's First Day of School!!!

Charlie getting ready to leave for school! Ryan trying to get back in the house.

Charlie's first moments in his classroom as a Cosgriff Tiger!



Charlie and his buddy Alex waiting for Alex's big brother Michael to get out of school.

My Sweet Charlie,

I cannot believe that you started your first day of school today. What a big day it was for all of us! You are in the three-year-old program at Cosgriff, which is where Mommy went to school. I am so happy that you will also be a Cosgriff Tiger.

It was a great morning. You had some yogurt for breakfast and then we got you dressed in your outfit that you picked out last night. You looked so handsome--you always do! I loved how excited you were to pack your new Toy Story lunch box into your Thomas the Train backpack.

We got to school at 815 and waited for Mrs. Cimbora to open the door. You already met a new friend today...Jett Rimando. You also have some friends in your class who you already knew like Luca Crosswhite and Kate Dunn. And your good friend Thomas is also at Cosgriff but in a different class.

Your first day was spent getting to know the other kids and your teachers. You also talked about your favorite foods, which you said was pizza ( I am not so sure about that!).

After school, you went to Extended Day for a bit and then Heather picked you up and took you to their house so that you could play with Michael and Alex. You will be going over there every Monday, and I think that will be a lot of fun for all of you!

Mommy is so proud of you. I love how excited you get to try new things. You were one of the few kids who did not seem scared or cry when they got dropped off. I also cannot believe that you are old enough to start pre-school. Were you not just in my belly not that long ago? The time goes by so quickly, and we are enjoying every single moment of it. You are so much fun! You are so smart. And so sweet.

Thank you, Charlie, for making me smile every day! Have fun my little tiger. Enjoy every day!

I love you too, too much!

Mommy